Volume 5, Issue 74: The Wild Things
"“Animals howl, he had been told, to declare their existence.”
The book is out. People tend to like it, I think. I hope you have bought your copy. If you have not, there is no time like the present: Buy now. If you have already bought the book, you are encouraged to leave it a review on Goodreads or Amazon, or both. It helps. Thank you.
What’s the first thing you remember that made you laugh your ever-loving ass off? There is a certain kind of laughter that, when you are young, that can feel revolutionary, something so funny, so I can’t believe this exists, that it can open up the entire universe. If the world can produce something this funny, what else is it capable of?
This is that first thing for me.
People talk about formative, and pivotal, cultural experiences from their youth all the time, but they’re usually something serious. The book that made you feel seen for the first time, the movie that transported you to another plane of existence, the TV show that made you feel less alone. The great film I Saw the TV Glow is explicitly about this, about a TV show that two lonely outcast friends bond over so intensely that they find it inextricable from their actually growing up experience; it begins to feel as real as their actual lives, and ends up, when they get older, more prevalent in their memories than experiences that actually happened. (Dramatized beautifully in this scene.) But it’s always in the context of something serious. And I get it. I’ll never forget the first time I saw E.T., Do the Right Thing, JFK, Short Cuts, Husbands and Wives, and hearing Nevermind blasted a hole right through the middle of my skull. It will change you. It should.
But, if I’m being honest: None of them can really quite compare to the first time I watched The Naked Gun. It made me kind of lose my mind. I was 13 years old when I saw The Naked Gun, on home video, I think one of my friends had recorded it on their VCR, and I found it so explosively funny that it began to invade my thoughts out walking around the outside world. I quoted the movie constantly—my favorite as a young teenager was, unsurprisingly, “everywhere I look, something reminds me of her”—and sometimes I’d find myself using lines from the film without even realizing it. (“Nothing to see here! Please disperse!”) I simply could not believe a movie could be that funny—so relentlessly silly in the best possible way. It felt like it was reaching directly into my brain, and tickling it.
And that baseball scene, my god, for a young baseball fan who took the game deadly serious as a 13-year-old, it was as if it were too important to be laughed at, to see Enrico Pallazzo (“hey it’s Enrico Pallazzo!”) forget the words to the National Anthem, to see a called strike three turn into a dance floor spectacle, to see a guy slide into second base and get attacked by a tiger … I levitated straight to heaven right there. I now can’t watch a blooper package at a game without thinking of The Naked Gun.
There are better movies. There are movies that mean more to me personally. There are movies that will forever stand the test of time. But if I were on my deathbed, and my last moments were to be spent watching only one movie … I think it might be The Naked Gun. I really do.
I made my way to all the Zucker brothers and Abrahams movies, from the original Kentucky Fried Movie (which has not aged well in a Cultural Sensitivity sense but man, there are some pretty amazing moments; “Christ, did a cow shit in here?”) to of course Airplane! to the criminally underrated Top Secret! (which should have been centered in all Val Kilmer updates; also, it has one of my favorite sight gags of all time) to Hot Shots!, which didn’t have the Zucker brothers but is just as funny as all the others. I also quote that movie constantly, still today. Anytime someone hands me a check, or I sign someone sort of financial deal, I cannot help myself from saying, “Excellent, now I can blow it all on hats.” I will do this the rest of my life.
The last movie I ever saw in a drive-in movie theater was, way back in 1994, in Rockford, Illinois, The Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult. It wasn’t as funny as the other ones, and I still loved every minute of it. Three months later, I learned that, if they made any more of these movies, Nordberg was unlikely to be in them.
These movies are ridiculous, absurd, sometimes offensive and, still, to this day, roll-on-the-floor funny. There is something oddly audacious how committed they are to the simple act of constructing jokes, as if it is the most purely altruistic pursuit on the planet. Not all the jokes land, but sometimes the ones that fail are even funnier, like you can’t believe they would have been willing to try something so stupid in the first place. (“It’s like a big Tylenol, but with wings!” falls into this category.) I just love these movies. I love them so much. And I am my most child-like when watching them. I made my kids sit down and watch Airplane! with me a couple of years ago, and during the film, I wasn’t their dad. I was just a giggling mad man who kept rewinding the film to make sure they caught every joke and every bit. They liked it. But I think they liked watching me lose my shit even more.
It is axiomatic to say that they don’t make movies like this anymore; it’s hard to get any straight comedies made anymore, let alone something as surreal as these. There have been some attempts at TV shows in this vein; Rashida Jones’ hit-or-miss-but-still-pretty-wonderful-at-times “Angie Tribeca” probably came closest to the Naked Gun spirit. Alfred Molina was particularly inspired in it.
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Humor has changed a lot since the Naked Gun movies; being willing to go anywhere has lost a lot of its charm. I understand this and honestly don’t see anything wrong with it; I tend to find comedians who complain the most about “cancellations” or being “muzzled” are the ones who were relying too much on shock in their comedy in the first place. If something is funny, it is funny—part of the best comedy is watching comedians navigate cultural mores and make something that both is aware of them and still knows how to transgress them in a clever way. These cultural changes aren’t restrictions; they’re a challenge—an invitation to be even more inventive. I think if you’re complaining about comedy culture, your time would be a lot better spent, you know, being funnier.
I will still, nevertheless, forever have the soft spot for a movie that is indeed willing to go anywhere, shamelessly, almost pathetically, for every possible joke.
This nostalgia—inevitably, in a forever recycled cultural universe—has led inexorably to, of course, another Naked Gun movie. A new one, coming out this summer. The remaining Zucker brother is on record as being against the film’s existence, perhaps largely because he wasn’t asked to be a part of it.
But I will confess: The trailer strikes me as very promising.
The Seth MacFarlane connection makes me nervous—I’m glad he’s had a political awakening but I still am obliged to remind you that Seth MacFarlane sucks—but I’ll admit that the guy knows his way around a gag, and that Akiva Schaffer of the Lonely Island, as well as the sadly forgotten but very funny Chip n’ Dale movie (with John Mulaney, Andy Samberg and Tim Robinson), is directing is encouraging. It won’t be the same. But it doesn’t have to be. It just has to be funny.
The world is dark and confusing and, increasingly, dangerously insane. We escape however and wherever we can. And sometimes, the best escape is to lose yourself in the dumbest possible jokes, to give yourself up to something that will just put you on the floor, rolling in hysterics. The world has much misery for us. But if it can produce something this funny, well, dammit: This world cannot be all bad.
Here is a numerical breakdown of all the things I wrote this week, in order of what I believe to be their quality.
American Life Has Become an Endless Zombie Debate, The New York Times. Always great to be back in the Times.
This Time, the Celebrity Fans Mean It, The Washington Post. I understand Timothee Chalamet so much more right now than I ever have, and surely ever will.
Are the Cardinals For Real? MLB.com. The only real question on my mind right now.
Guy Ritchie Movies, Ranked, Vulture. Updated with Fountain of Youth.
Jalen Brunson Saves the Knicks (For at Least a Night), New York. I know what I’m doing tonight.
The Pacers Might Just Be a Bad Matchup for the Knicks, New York. Written after Game Four.
This Week’s Power Rankings, MLB.com. I bet this is as high as the Cardinals get this year.
PODCASTS
Grierson & Leitch, Grierson is back from Cannes. We talk about how it was, as also discuss “Mission Impossible: Final Reckoning” and “Friendship.”
Morning Lineup, I did Monday’s and Friday’s shows.
Seeing Red, Bernie Miklasz and I wonder if the Cardinals are really a playoff team
LONG STORY YOU SHOULD READ THIS MORNING … OF THE WEEK
“Crime has plummeted. So why don’t Americans feel safe?” David Wallace-Wells, The New York Times. People, honestly, just want to be scared.
ONGOING LETTER-WRITING PROJECT!
This is your reminder that if you write me a letter and put it in the mail, I will respond to it with a letter of my own, and send that letter right to you! It really happens! Hundreds of satisfied customers!
Write me at:
Will Leitch
P.O. Box 48
Athens GA 30603
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO
“Shake It Up,” The Cars. I’m always surprised how little a cultural imprint The Cars have today. Pretty great little pop rock band!
Remember to listen to The Official Will Leitch Newsletter Spotify Playlist, featuring every song ever mentioned in this section. Let this drive your listening, not the algorithm!
Also, there is an Official The Time Has Come Spotify Playlist.
Let’s go Knicks! Have a great weekend, all.
Best,
Will
Absolutely “The Naked Gun” for me. I’ll never forget me and my friend Kyle laughing hysterically for hours.
“Nice beaver.
Thank you. I just had it stuffed”
Just finished “Lloyd McNeil’s Last Ride” and it is a superb piece of writing. I just sent copies to my two brothers, too! You don’t have to be a father or even a parent at all to appreciate this novel - you just need to have really really loved someone. If you’re fortunate enough to have done that, Mr. Leitch’s book will speak to you in many, many ways. If you haven’t yet, please buy it. It’s a keeper.